If I get swine flu, so help me

I am going to pretend that the reason I am watching this show -Melrose Place- is because, I caught the first episode and have been beside myself, not knowing who killed Sydney. Instead of the fact that I am just so easily entertained. I will also pretend that now that the show is wrapping up that mystery and Ashlee Simpson is leaving, I am going to stop watching this show. Instead of the fact that it only makes this show more appealing to me. She was my least favorite and now she is going away, therefore it makes my guilt of loving such crappy TV, less. Now if they would just get rid of Bad Haircut David. I spend so much of time while watching this show screaming at the TV - "Seriously, they can't do a better job with his hair, every episode it looks more and more disgusting!"- which can't hear me. And it solidifies the fact that I need another hobby.L