Just say NO.

So we like to watch bad movies at my house. Because every once in a while you can stumble onto what we like to refer to as good bad movies. I know you know what I am talking about. Its so rare to find, but when you do, Oh man it is such a good feeling. Some of the best good bad movies tend to be, but not always, Horror movies. For instance there is a series of Horror movies called "Ginger Snaps", it is about two sisters and one gets bitten by a werewolf and therefore turns into a werewolf and feasts on boys at school. It is totally "Jennifer's Body" - which I am going to see - before there was a "Jennifer's Body", and is a way better movie than you would think.

So last night in hopes of rounding out our good movie - I Love you Man - with a good bad movie, we rented Scourge. It was between this and a movie called Spiker, in which a seven foot albino spikes people to death, and in hindsight it probably was the better movie, who would of guessed?

Anyway turns out Scourge was just a bad bad movie, I didn't even finish it.

This is the synopsis I pulled from IMDB: An ancient pestilence called The Scourge has been set free in a small town after being entombed in a church's masonry for a century and a half. As bodies rapidly pile up, nothing stands between the spawning Scourge and the rest of the town except our young heroes Scott and Jessie who rediscover their love for each other in the process.

It starts with a flash back of 1841 in a small town in Washington, I wasn't paying too much attention, but from the synopsis I suppose this is when the Scourge is entombed. Then cut to present day with a awesome opening with a bad song that sounds like something you might hear on the soundtrack of "Buffy the Vampire Slayer", the one with Luke Perry and that girl Krisy Swanson who was in Pretty in Pink as the girl at Prom that falls for the all to loveable Duckie. You have the, rebel with a heart of gold, hero Scott, who is not too unfortunate looking, riding his motorbike like he has no children. He is looking to get out of town now his old man has passed, and he doesn't care where he goes just as long as Washington is in his rear view mirror. Anyway him and his bestie Jessie, who is apparently the only girl in town that doesn't dress like she works at the local strip club, run around this movie acting as if they are in an after school special. Where the Scourge is not a demon/creature but a new STD that is infecting the entire Senior class. I mean everyone in this movie acts terribly. Which is not so shocking, but it is uncomfortable.

And the poor actress who plays Jessie has the biggest Zit on her chin the entire movie, I am talking, distractingly large. I am sure she was super bummed, you finally get a part in a movie, and you wake up with a planet on your chin. And since they probably spent the entire budget of the movie on the Scourge creatures' CGI and the Hooded Cloaks and horses in the flash backs, there was no hope for her getting it airbrushed out, tough break.

The only good things about this movie were 1. Once the Scourge was inside the host victim, they proceeded to eat disgusting things and belch like Barny from the Simpson's. So you had these totally skanky chicks with their lips a quiverin. 2. The creature passed from host to host through the belly button. For this to happen the current host had to kneel and become level with the next persons navel. This made for some hilarious and not very appropriate looking positions.

So I would say, just from my personal experience, if you see Scourge at the redbox this evening and you are looking for a good time. Resist the urge to incorporate this into the mix. L