Thanks Steph

There is another Twilight book coming to us soon.

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Stephenie Meyer just announced a book or rather novella told from Bree's perspective. Those of us who have read the Twilight books, know who Bree is. For those who don't, she is a newborn Vampire who is turned by Victoria (the redhead who talks from the side of her mouth). I don't even know how I feel about this, but I am for sure that I feel something about it. 

I know I will read it, 1- because from June 7th to July 15th you can read it for free on www.breetaner.com. Thanks Steph! and 2- I hope reading this book will feel like reading Twilight for the first time. Before all the hype and movies came and took something I loved and made it a redheaded step son of what Twilight should be. Oh well!!!

I also think if there was a minimal character to have a story told, one that I would actually want to read, because I feel and always felt (when I heard she planned on writing this story, plus, can we get something other than Twilight out of you Stephy Poo?) like Bree's story was blah, but we all know that even if Steph isn't a great writer she is a good story teller. Anyway, the story I would prefer is Riley's. Or whatever that boys name is, the one Victoria uses, says she loves him, got him to turn all the vampires, etc. etc. Now that would be a good read. Would it not?

I like to watch you when you sleep

I can't stop playing Spider Solitaire. I love it so much and I am becoming obsessed.

(My desk at work)

I find myself thinking about it when I am not with it. I find myself dreaming about it at night. Picturing it holding me in its arms and telling me everything is alright; just put the red club on the black spade, it whispers delicately in my ear. I find myself dressing for it, changing outfit after outfit, because all want is to look nice for Spider. I find myself arriving at its house in the middle of the night, not knowing how I got there. I find myself pulling it out of  bed and shushing it as it tries to scream out. Then I hum to it softly as I wrap the duct tape around its hands and feet, making sure it doesn't hurt too much. I find myself lowering it slowing and carefully into the trunk of my car, and even when Spiders eyes plead, I just simply kiss it sweetly. Then I find myself tossing its precious self off a bridge and smiling to myself as Spider falls, because now I can sleep, now that I know I was the only one to ever have, ever love, Spider Solitaire.

Here today and here to stay

After a very long night of multiple batteries and pulling my hair out, I have these pictures of when we went to Sundance!

This is us the night before practicing faces for when we meet JGL (which we didn't cause he is lame and I hate him, Ha, I love him!)

Excited next day faces!!!

Me with Danny McBride, he was super sweet, funny, awesome and just delightful. And doesn't he look pleased as punch to be taking this picture with me?

This is an important one, because he is smiling at me, I am telling him that he looks really nice and that his beard is coming in real nice! Plus you can Lucy's big fat head!

Here they are, the Lucer and Danny, don't they look just so happy together? Lucy is either really happy or in pain? Either way Danny is sure happy! That girl with the pigtails, was really nice, she was there to see Rainn Wilson, he never showed. Boo. 

But she did get to meet Tony Hale!!! Whoop!

This is me with Rinko Kikuchi, she was in Brothers Bloom as Bang Bang and she was the deaf girl in Babel!! Yay for Sundance. We also saw Josh Radnor, from How I Met Your Mother. No picture, but he did tell us he had recently broken up with girlfriend Lindsay Price. Good to know I guess.

Little Ditty

A song for your windy Tuesday

 

Little Ditty

In B minor

 

 

Who likes to wear short skirts on windy days? Liz does!

Who rants when they have to wear pants? Liz does!

Who likes to show her bum to everyone? Liz does!

Oh, there is nothing like the freedom of short skirts blowing in the frosty breeze.

I must express, confess and detest the mess of me. 

Its a sight for all to see, my short skirt dancing in the spring time breeze.

The fabric whips and grips at my thighs 

as I slowly move from side to side and when it finally blows, you can hear all the people cry!

Who likes to wear short skirts on windy days? Liz does!

Old, young, mother, son, it matters not, who gets to see my crotch!

Trees, bees and sometimes leaves get to see what's between my knees

That' what happens when you prefer, like me, to keep it fabric free.

Tights are there and so is underwear. I'm not commando, that's a short skirt no,no.

But to fit this song, I say, how else do you get boys to stare, unless you don't wear underwear?

Who knows that Marylin ain't go nothing on me? Liz does!

Who thinks your begging for her to wear leggins? Liz does!

Who thinks its no use having anatomy, unless its there for all to see?

Liz Does!!

BIG fat pany waist

Lucy and I have this deep loathing for Hayden Panettiere. I am not 100% sure how we came to realize this, off the top of my head, I assume it has something to do with this (because how dumb are you?), this (because I am mad they even dated and even though she thinks she is adult because she dates older men, she isn't) and this (because it makes me sick). I just think she is super nasty and call me jealous or whatever, but she is nasty. I think she wears too much make up. I also think if you have to try to be hot, then your aren't really hot, case and point:

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And just in case we didn't hate her enough, I got this email from Lucy

Hayden Panywaist in the new Joshua Radin music video.

why? why? why?

And -- Why? Why? Why? is she in the video? I don't know because color me confused but none of these lyrics ever apply to her:

Sitting here, on this lonely dock < yes so lonely, that I understand, but Hayden?
Watch the rain play on the ocean top < I really like to do that also
All the things I feel I need to say
I can't explain in any other way

I need to be bold < Bold is beautiful, just like you Josh, but not Hayden. Come on.
Need to jump in the cold water
Need to grow older with a girl like you
Finally see you are naturally
The one to make it so easy
When you show me the truth
Yeah, I'd rather be with you
Say you want the same thing too

Now here's the sun, come to dry the rain
Warm my shoulders and relieve my pain
You're the one thing that I'm missing here
With you beside me I no longer fear

I need to be bold
Need to jump in the cold water
Need to grow older with a girl like you
Finally see you are naturally
The one to make it so easy
When you show me the truth
Yeah, I'd rather be with you
Say you want the same thing too

I could have saved so much time for us
Had I seen the way to get to where I am today
You waited on me for so long
So now, listen to me say: < Nope you are done...wait one more versus, alright be quick about it

I need to be bold
Need to jump in the cold water
Need to grow older with a girl like you
Finally see you are naturally
The one to make it so easy
When you show me the truth
Yeah, I'd rather be with you
Say you want the same thing too
Say you feel the way I do < Yes I do love you! But honestly who are we talking about here, Hayden? No. That is what I thought.

Hurts your face

After much thinking and pondering and deliberation and contemplating, I came to this: Easter is the best time to purchase candy! So with this nugget of knowledge I present my top 5 favorite Easter Candies.

1- Sweet Tart Gummy Bunnies

These are amazing in texture and tarty sweetness. I ate so much of them this season, my teeth are now sensitive to hot and cold. So Yes, I totally messed up my teeth. But I can not help myself.

2 -WarHead Sour Easter Eggs

I can't even find a picture of the right gum. Rest assured it is out there and they are amazingly sour. The egg itself is gum, but inside is sour powder and so much of it, you will find yourself choking in ecstasy, or, simply watering at the mouth while you hunt for pictures, like I am.

3 - Sweet Tart Chicks, Ducks and Bunnies

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These are so addicting, I ate half a bag for breakfast this morning!



4- Whole Foods - All Natural Gummie Bunnies
Damn can't find a picture. Anthony hated them, but I thought they were all sorts of velvety and delicious. They are extra sticky and almost taffy like, but man they were so tasty!

5 - Reeses PeanutButter Eggs

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This is universal and I don't think I need to defend this shirt to you

I will entertain you with a little soft shoe!

Fact: Mitt Romney likes Chipotle. How do I know this? Because we (my book club) saw him there on Saturday and he was smiling like he was enjoying his meal, so I put two and two together.  It was 100% him, and my cousin took a picture and once she uploads it, I will post the picture here, just so you know that I am not pulling your leg. After seeing him, we were sort of on a high, so we did what any girl does when she is high, err.... on a high, we went to Nordstrom Rack and tried on shoes.They were all mostly excellent, then we came across a pair that were amazing tacky and I was asked to blog about them. First I could not take a picture, because my phone doesn't let me transfer or send picture messages. Which I don't mind, until times like this. But I thought, no big deal I can google the shoe. Which I have been doing for two days and this is the best I can find. 

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Which doesn't even do the job, its such a let down and I apologize, but at least you can get a better visual with this image. The shoe we saw had in place of a nice black canvas (like this shoe does, and doesn't look half bad)  a nice denim one! That is right, denim, and not a nice ink rinse, but a light blue, Hello and welcome to 1992, denim. A color in which, at the very sight evokes the automatic imagery of  Rodeo Cowboy britches or a jumper.

Neither of which scream, fashion, at all. So it begs the question as to why Nordstrom would even have a sandal like that in their possession? Furthermore, who outside of the Heathers wardrobe department, would even ok such a sandal to be manufactured?

Well Yeah....

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 Ricky Martin has aged perfectly. Although its not hard for him, he is an exceptional use of skin, hair, muscles and ears. I was going to say he is sexier now than he use to be, but turns out even when he was Livin La Vida Loca, he was still super hot, which in my mind is different than simply being handsome, he is handsome, but mostly just smokin hot! Like the kind of guy you want to get dirty with, dirty Hot!! And so it only makes sense that he would come forward finally and say, Yes I am Gay! 

First of all Ricky, um yeah... we all knew. Second of all, How could you not be? Men as hot as you are, are always gay, it is the great cosmic joke. Us ladies don't ever get to get dirty with you.

Beller is alive!

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One of the dudes in my office wife just had a baby yesterday! Sweet it is. Also sweet, they named her Bella (which I don't know that she was named after Bella of Twilight, but I know that his wife has read Twilight). It is a very cute name, that I will not deny, yet, I wondered how popular that name was, so I googled it. According to Babynames.com, Bella is a popular baby name, at least in 2009. Even more popular than Bella is Isabella, which is Bella from Twilight's real name. Which try as I might, I can't ignore the feeling that Twilight is the reason for the popularity of these names. Am I crazy to assume that? I also assumed Edward would be a popular boy name, but its not. Interestingly, Jacob is and not only that but has risen in popularity. Seems team Jacob takes their responsibility of being a super fan, that much more serious than us on Team Edward. Although, when it comes to teams, if you on Team Jacob, your still on the loosing team.

1, 2, 3, 4 tell me that you love me more

Instead of trying to count up all the women Tiger and Jesse apparently slept with, why don't we start counting all the women they didn't sleep with. Then we can all move on with our lives and start focusing on really important things like this guy.

Grigori Perelman or Mathsputin

Homeboy solved the worlds most complex math problem (Max Fisher would be so lucky) in 2002. It took math experts until 2006 to determine he had done it correctly. Which how do you correct the worlds most complex math problem? Furthermore, what is the point of creating that problem and then solving it? What exactly does it contribute to society or contribute at all? Regardless, he did it and they ( the royal they) confirmed it correct. Then they offered Mathsputin an award and prize money of 1 million dollars, and he turned it down. Because they say he is a little odd..... like, no duh! Have you ever heard the phrase "Crazy Smart"? Does it shock you to know he is reclusive, has bad hygiene and lives with his mother. Why worry about how you smell when your brain is probably working out how many gallons of water you would use in your life time, because even if you wash today, it will just get dirty again, and again and again. Can you even imagine what its like for him, living among people like us, who thrive on things like Jersey Shore? I think our society is stupid and I'm no Einstein. 

Blew through me like bullet holes

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The thing that is so baffling, is she knows that people follow her around and take her picture. So- what the hell Mishca? What the hell are you doing picking your nose in public and what the hell is up with you lately? If it helps you to get it together, you are starting to look like 

 Sebastian Bach, and he is a dude.

Hey there Sexfron

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Vanessa, the bottom of your pockets are visible, maybe that wildfox got them or maybe your shorts are too short? 

Also Zac, did you forget to look in the mirror after you had lunch? Cuz you have something super nasty on your upper lip.

I like your shirt, it would look especially good on my bedroom floor

Other good pick up lines include:

1. Was that an earthquake or did you just rock my world.
2. Hey I just realized this, but you look alot like my next girlfriend.
3. I know I'm not a grocery item, but I can tell when your checking me out.
4. Do you want to make millions? millions of babies!

Bad pickup lines

1. Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?
2. Did you fart? because you just blew me away.
3. If you were a new burger at McDonald's you'd be Mcgorgeous.
4. Hi there Hottie! <-----especially when you are wearing an absolutely filthy Tennessee tuxedo (denim on denim) and you look like you just got done doing some crack. Of course I am just going to walk away, but that doesn't make me a bitch. Just make it more creative, for instance, I once had a teenage boy offer me this pick up line: Hey baby can I bake you some muffins. And it was so funny, I laughed and almost took him up on his offer.

Drag the landing strip

Lucy and I were sitting around watching the boob tube last night, waiting, waiting for Marianne to get home. We started with the Office, because it is always a good time and its what our Papa was watching before he went upstairs to sleep some. 

Then we got antsy and started channel surfin. Not really looking to watch anything good but something else, we just knew there had to be something else.

And we stumbled upon a gem of a show.

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RuPaul's Drag Race

First thing is first. RuPaul is the first Drag Queen I ever knew about. To this day I remember her coming forward as the face of drag queens or whatever it was, when I was just a kid. I remember thinking, how in the world does that man walk around in heels? I can't even do that. Also thinking, it was the best looking man, dressed as a women, I had ever seen. Which wasn't saying much considering I had probably only knowingly seen one drag queen to date, her. 

Secondly I have and odd fascination with Drag Queens in general. I use to work in a jewelry store in the mall when I was a teen and we had a bunch of Queens that would come in to buy their jewelry for their drag shows. It was the best part of the job. They were fabulous and flamboyant and they would tell a sister what was up, and I made them, tell me stories about their shows (I was to young to go to one) and bring in pictures and we talked shop for hours. Then we would spend a hour or so, putting together the best jewelry ensembles, things I would never think would look good.  They were magnificent they just knew what would look good, even if it was the most heinous looking stuff on the stand, like earings the size of my left leg, in colors that could be and would be, likely to make someone puke, just at the sight. It was fabulous on them because they knew how to work it!

Third and finally, any show that has a final face off as a lipsynch show down, is a show worth watching, in my opinion. And the only thing it left us wondering was: does RuPaul age? She looks older, but still fabulous, I wonder is she is using the old, blood of a hundred virgins, regime? And do all drag queens just know "He's the Greatest Dancer" By Sister Sledge?

The girl is done

Yes!Yes! Yes!!! Katherine Heigl has left the building

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I didn't always hate her. But when you talk crap about the show and movie (Knocked Up) that made you famous, you just don't deserve to be famous anymore and you deserve to be hated. Grey's Anatomy and Knocked Up, were her spring board into stardom. Before them, she was the semi hot chick from Roswell and the Bride of Chucky. But whatever...act like a super asshat.

This was obviously the route Grey's was going when they turned Izzie into a whiny, no go for nothing piece of crap. I mean to blame Alex for getting fired and then just disappearing = piece of crap. They were making us hate her so that we wouldn't want her to come back. Which she was a really crappy character after Denny, Denny made Izzie, Katherine should have left after Denny, but at least I know now that I don't have to put up with her any longer. 

Hallelujah!!!

The Quest is forever

 We watched a documentary last night called "Second Skin". Its about the crazy ness that is the world of MMORPG gamers or (Massively Multilayer Online Role Play Games;like World of WarCraft, EverQuest and SecondLife.)

Its insane, just pure insanity. I understand that this is just the way they prefer to spend their time. And I am not judging the fact that they are computer gamers, because who am I to judge, I am a huge nerd. 

I am more judging the amount of time these MMORPG gamers tend to spend playing. Some have families and jobs and they play maybe eight hours or more. Which when you work for eight hours and you game for eight hours or more, that leaves you only eight ore less hours to sleep and be normal. Not nearly enough time to live, I mean when do you get in your ninja lessons? But I guess when you game, you don't need ninja lessons.

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But there are also the ones who only play, sometimes for days at a time. Never leaving the killing glow of the computer screen. 1. Because they can't 2. Why would they? Their fake life is so much more thrilling (I mean have you ever raided the Legacy of Ykesah and clobbered troll pirates, taking the island as your own? NO. Well...it...is...Awesome! and is sure beats the pants off saying "You want fries with that?" 

Plus, you are gaming with people from all over the world and they are just as nerdy as you are. Also, I am way funnier and I can bee myself in the game, I interact with people like me and there isn't judgment)

Which I understand, I really do....

But its not real life, its make believe. The only real element is you and the other people you play with and if none of you are a real person outside of the game, then none of it is real. Its just a big lie, a way to escape (which I need that too, we all do) but at the end of the day, what kind of a life is that?

* Note: I may need to take back my judgment. as I previously stated I am a dreamer and therefore I don't spend much time in reality either. It is a far better life when you create it yourself!

I puked in your shoes

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Avril: Hey there sk8ter boi.

Derek: HOW many times must I tell you Avril, don't call me that.

Avril: Oh OK, don't shout so loud, I think I am going to puke again.

Derek: Yeah, last night was rough wasn't it, we partied like the rock stars we never use to be.
Avril: *burp* Yeah it felt good, not so much now, but during, man we are so punk rawk!!!

Derek: I know! this shirt with the gun and this blazer with the buttons..... um Hello!

Avril: I know! and Look at me... I am just oozing it from my pours!!

Derek: Yeah!... wait....no... that's Vodka and generally trashy stink.

Avril: Shut up, what do you know, you look like full grown midget. Didn't I divorce you already, anyhow! 

Derek: I told you not to bring that up...shit Avril... now I'm gonna cry.... my eyes will get even more puffy, you are so insensitive some times.

Avril: Oh, put a cork in it Gimli.

Dear Sandra

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Congratulations on your win. Oscar, that is the big leagues, in the industry of the silver screen. I personally didn't see Blindside, but I really wanted to. It looked like a real good teary time and as a women there are few things I like more that a good teary time. They include but are never limited to: flowers, kitchenware, rainbows and snuggles.  Also I totally love you. I just need to throw that out there, because right now you need to hear things like that. Things like your hair is very shinny and your outfit never makes you look fat. If there was someone who looked fat or trashy in their out fit its that good for nothing whore with the tattoos. I mean lets be honest, you know who I am talking about. She is trash and if the rumors are true Sandy dear, don't let it totally mess with your self perception. You are gorgeous, talented, hot/happen, smart, super funny, successful and Oscar worthy!!

And don't let a messy heap of two day old rotten potatoes and sour milk, let you believe any different.

It hurts

Burning an extremity of any kind is not really a fun thing to do on Monday, or, if I am being totally honest, fun for any day of the week. In my own personal life I consider my ears and eyelashes, as well as my nose and knees, extremities, also. Why? who knows really, but I kind of think its funny. Mostly because, people are not sure that I actually know what an extremity is when I refer to my nose as one. It is all in good fun.

Not in good fun, is actually burning your finger on the hot plate of a coffee machine. Neither is leaving only a couple swigs of coffee in the bottom of the pot and keeping the button switched to on. Which is why I was over there fidgeting with the damn thing in the first place. Making it a better work eviroment for all, by emptying the coffee pot and rinsing it out and turning it off. So that none had to suffer the smell of burned 

 coffee. 

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NO Good Deed Goes Un Punished and yet another reason Tea Rules and Coffee Drools. But if I may, I would drink coffee more, just to have one of these retro makers, in my kitchen. I would I really would.

Calling all corners, there is a dead one here

Like, are you a blue personality or a red personality?

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Personality tests are shit.

When I take those I am always, always a mix between Blue and White, which means: 

You are comfortable, You express yourself softly and sincerely. Your personality is easy to read. People find you determined, yet flexible. You are someone with whom almost anyone can get along.

Seriously? That is my personality? What a snooze fest.

For example what does: You are comfortable, mean really? Like I am comfortable to be around? I always find myself comfortable when I am sitting? Even though my tights have bunched up my undies in a ball, I am still comfortable? 

It is just too broad. 

Yet, every time I am presented with one of these things, I take it. Even though the answers are never anything I don't already suspect about my self. Yes, I know that I am can get along with almost anyone, anyone can tell you that.

I think I am, like most, searching for an answer as to why I am they way I am, not, the way I am, that I already know.

Of all the countless personality test I have ever taken I have only come across one that really, really got to me.

It was super complicated and I can't remember much about it except the end, when it told me: You are not very realistic. 

Because that is a truth about myself that I knew, but never admitted to myself. At least until I took that test, now I am a bit/tiny/smidgen better about recognizing this in me.

I am not very realistic, no matter what it involves, my perception of actual reality and my crazy delusions are so different, it is frightening. I spend 99% of my day in a state of dreaming. I dream often and I dream big, even when I am awake. I think its the reason I find comfort in books, TV and movies, because its a voice I recognize, its not reality.

It is also the reason I write. Simply to make some room inside this bulbs head of mine, as if getting my dreams onto paper will help me feel more sane. 

And it does help from the point I start to type, to the point when I stop. Then its all about large bats taking over planet earth and Jake Gyllenhaal being super impressed by my ninja skills.

I'm starving

If there was ever a movie that I felt strongly about seeing, it was "The Hunger".  

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David Bowie as a vampire, cheese and crackers, Batman!

The anticipation that was digesting inside my guts for this movie, was not unlike trying to digest a whole mass of 99 cent tacos from Del Taco, mean and stinky, but really easy going down.

On the whole it was a very interesting concept for a vampire movie. 

Essentially there is the vampiress (sexy chick I didn't recognize) and her vampire lover (Bowie). They have been together for centuries and they are hot and happening and all that great jazz that comes along with being a damned creature of the undead. 

At least it is until David Bowie can't sleep(very Edward Cullen of him) and starts to age very rapidly. Enter a very young Susan Sarandon as a doctor--who as far as I can tell -- studies the effects sleep has on age. 

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Bowie goes to Susan for help, but she straight denies him. It doesn't really explain why he starts to age, but we surmise it has something to do with not sleeping, and we also find out that this has happened to others that belonged to vampiress. So there is no help and Bow-dog, turns into a walking mummy in a day; all kinds of gnarly skin and a real nice set of bones. And vampiress puts him in a coffin, even though he isn't technically dead, but he is sort of a useless sack.  

Miss vampiress must get a new lover and who does she choose? Susan of course. Turns out there was way more Susan in the movie than Bowie and that really sucked. Although I think for the 80's it was a pretty risky movie. Blood, Nudity, Girl on Girl Kissing, which I have a hunch is the only reason this movie ever got watched back in the day.

(Image)* not even two girls, this is a women and Bowie. 

I know he looks feminine,its why he is hot. 

Overall the movie was kinda lame, but really what did I expect?

I'm just gonna put it out there

From the school of thought, if you put it out into the universe, it will happen. I would like to put this into the cosmos's<-- shouldn't it be like comosi?

Anyhoodle. So beknowst to some and unbeknownst to others: there will be a third Batman film directed by Chris Nolan(Hallelujah praise Jesus). He has also been pegged as the next man to re invent Superman. Which given what he has done for Batman, does excite me, however, how many Superman movies do we, as a society, really need? Further more, does anyone else out there feel personal offended that Smallville is still on the air and continuing to ruin the good name of Superman, year after terribly scripted year? Because I for shiz do. For shiz.

Which quite nicely brings me to my whole entire point. I would like to put this out into the 

cosmos's <---seriously it just looks wrong

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Please- Chris Nolan, make Michael C. Hall the Riddler in Batman #3. Because we all know how great he would do and how amazing the movie would be. This was something I heard from Anthony, who heard it on a message board and it just sort of settled in and took over as my respiratory system. So like I said, I'm just gonna put it out there.

Thank You for you time.

I would pay almost anything to see this

Follow this link, then come back here to discuss.

As far as late night men go, I am so all over Conan O'Brien. Not only do I find him super high larry ass. I really find him sexy. I think his sexual appeal has a lot to do with how funny he is. If this tour was coming to SLC, I would totally go. Even the thought of traveling to NV to see him, doesn't sound so bad. Although I don't think I will in reality travel to see Conan be sexy, funny or otherwise.

XOXO - Dr. Domore

After a very lengthy break, Gossip Girl returned with a vengeance on Monday night. As such,

I need to work through my feelings about the show, so lucky for all of you, I have this blog as a forum for that inner dialogue. Even if you haven't seen the show or you simply detest it with every fiber of your being (Anthony) at least you can enjoy my rantings, Right?

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First thing is first, I was so ready for Serena to hook up with Nate. Mostly it had everything to do with the fact that Nate's cousin, whom Serena was all cozy with before break (BB) was not cute and he was married and the whole relationship made little to no sense to me. Secondly, they were itching to get togehter since the word go. I mean the whole reason Serena went to boarding school in season one, was because she slept with Nate, who at the time was dating Serena's best friend Blair. (Hello, if this isn't already your new favorite show, I don't know what to say other than....) but as it turns out, I think Serena is a bit of slut. Yes, that is right. I get that this is part of the show, everyone sleeping with everyone. But Serena has made the rounds and I am personally sick of her. And I am sick of Nate's lush eyebrows. Just stop furrowing them soooo much. Life is not that complicated. 

Which leads us to Little J. Oh, the hate I have for that girl. She is always dressed like a slutty zombie bride; too much make up and all. I realize that she is dressed this way because she is a fashion rebel, but  its exhausting.

 That and I really hate that she is going to get to make out with this box of cute-sicles

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It would be really great if Little J, died in a fiery death: after getting super drunk and dousing her clothing line in gasoline and lighting a match (she would die, cuz she is too drunk to get out before she inhales all that smoke, come on people... keep up)

And this nicely transitions into Chuck Bass and the fact that his mother as it turns out, didn't die giving birth to him at all. WTF? I was literally screaming at my TV when they introduced this plot point (BB). 

Finally and in conclusion, if Rufus and Lilly get a divorce, this show is dead to me.

Mind your P's and Q's

Does anyone know what our P's and Q's are?

Here is what I have come up with so far.

1. Peace and Quite

2. Please and Quilts

3. Purple and Orange

4. Puppies and Octupusses

5. Patrick and Quincy

I just don't know, but I could guess all day long and while speaking of Robert Pattinson

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I just have to put it out there that I am going to see "Remember Me" at some point. Maybe this weekend or maybe I will wait for it for it to come out on DVD, either way I will see it. I was only half on its bus, until I saw the trailer and 1. they used Breathe Me by Sia, for the song in the trailer. I love it and I can't get enough of it and therefore it makes the movie look amazing. 2. Chris Cooper plays Emilie de Ravin's Dad. I love Chris and I really Love Emilie, even if her hair is --a nesting for baby ducks--on Lost right now, she still looks hot. And whether I like to to admit it or not. Rob is super hot. I mean I don't want him to be, but he is. I use to have him as my computer background at work, alright...are you happy?

Rest in Pieces

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I was watching Good Morning American while getting ready this morning and they said that Corey Haim has passed away. Which really makes me sad. His whole life is sort of sad, if you think about it. He was the Robert Pattinson of the 1980's and then he started doing drugs and ended up being one Corey of the shows "The Two Coreys" . Or at least I thought he was super famous in the 1980's. I thought he did a bunch of great movies. Like wasn't he in  Lost Boys, yes, that I know for sure was him. Then there was Stand By Me, wait nope he isn't in that, but other Corey is. Then there is Goonies: nope wrong again, he isn't, but Sean Astin is and other Corey; again.

Anyway, regardless of what he did and didn't do. He was still too young to die. (wait wasn't he in that movie? Nope,  made for TV movie with Juliette Lewis and Brad Pitt. They dated back in the day, now that's crazy!)

Zach Galifianakis, I hardly knew you

If you have never seen Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis, I recommend you follow that link, or google it and just have your self a time.

 

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He is single-handedly making pudgy bearded dudes sexy as hell.

Also, if you need to see a great movie with him in it. I highly recommend Visioneers.

Even if he wasn't in it and it was just about people exploding, all by itself, it would be great, but then add Zach to the mixture and you have the best blueberry muffins in the world.

I would like to thank my sock drawer; for being so organized

Since I didn't see the Oscars, I had to do some investigating this morning when I got to work. I was super pleased that The Hurt Locker won best picture and a billion other awards (to see a list of nominees and winners click this), including but not limited to best Director. I literally high fived my computer with pure excitement. I don't know if Katherine Bigelow and James Cameron had a nasty divorce, all the same, it has got to do a girl good to beat your ex at something like an OSCAR!!!!

It also excited me to see that Jeff Bridges won for his role in Crazy Heart, I don't care if he is 60, he is one sexy beast.

 Christoph Waltz wining for his perfectly acted role in Inglorious Basterds, I felt was a given and it was given, so good on the Academy.

 I actually sort of feel that way about all the winners in general. It was a given and they were given. 

The only really sad thing about the Oscars this year, the dresses. It was overwhelming disappointing, especially for the the ladies who were actually nominated (Demi Moore looked great, but homegirl wasn't nominated or presenting or nothing?)

So the two best for me, of ladies actually attending because they were nominated or served some other significant purpose, are

(Gabby and Sandra; Images People.com)

Do it, do it, do it -- Now

Instead of watching the Oscars last night, I saw Alice in Wonderland.

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I really liked it a lot, yet today, the whole thing seems pretty forgettable. Well mostly-- I loved the March Hare-- he was completely batshit crazy and that made my heart smile.At the tea party when Crispin Glovers character shows up and the March Hare is trying, trying, so hard to keep it together, I thought I was going to loose it.  Most reviews I've read, site that Helena Bonham Carter, steals the show. Turns out, I would have to agree. I think I just fell in love with her in Fight Club and I continue to do every time I see her in a movie. It might have something to do with the fact that she goes out looking like this.

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whatever, I'm just going to post it

(NPR 3 minute Fiction *Here is the story I wrote and submitted. On one hand it makes me ill to post this, on the other, I am still posting it, aren't I?)

Table for Two

This café is our favorite. It’s located not far from our home and the view out onto Bleaker Street affords excellent people watching--which is something we can’t deny ourselves. By us, I mean myself and my younger sister, Alex. More than that, she is what keeps me sane; keeps the heart beating in my would-be empty chest.
She is prattling on about something I am only barely listening to. I am more interested in the fact that the SUV across the street (with its darkened windows) doesn’t seem to have moved since we got here. Its stillness makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. People on the sidewalk pass by in a steady stream. Even the light outside has begun to fade from orange to the dusky blue of faded denim. That car remains, still and settled, like a corpse. Anxiety about what this could mean tightens my gut. I can’t help but think, Why? Why here, and why now?
In a flash the headlights switch on giving me the only indication there is life inside the metal box. It’s a sign that they are waiting, and more importantly, they want me to know that they know… but what? My coffee is strong as I slowly sip at it, staring and waiting for the executioner to emerge. As the hot liquid hits my tongue and slides down my throat, it wakes me as well as a cold shower would.
“Abby, are you listening to me?” Alex’s voice cuts into my thoughts.
I turn my face from the window to hers. Her eyes are just like mine, a light ghostly grey. Our hair is the same; a warm dark brown as straight as a sheet. Hers is in a long braid running down her back, like it is most days. Mine is always in the standard bun, which is traditionally required for our gritty line of work. All the women abide by this rule, except Alex. Alex bends many rules and manages to get away with it every time. She doesn’t seem to notice the SUV, so I keep my face composed. I can tell that my lack of attention has bothered her. Even with my tensed thoughts, I can’t deny her anything.
“I am sorry, what were you saying?” I offer; shifting not only my eyes but my body towards her.
Alex stares at me with her mouth partially open; her gaze penetrating. Her expression for the briefest of moments is desperate and she begins to speak again. Before even emitting a word, however, the server returns with our check.
“Is there anything else I can get you?” he asks through a set of perfectly straight teeth. Perfect, like a picket fence. I manage to shake my head and make sure to express a nice smile as he turns and leaves. I turn back to Alex and her face is fully composed, though stern.
“I’m leaving the Corporation. I’m done with it: the games, the lies; but mostly the killing. I can’t sleep Abs, and the nightmares. I just…..” The words leave her mouth and hang dead in the air. This is why they are here. No one leaves.
For a few long moments nothing registers but a low ringing in my ears.
I’m brought back by a sound across the street-- car door opening. It’s the sound of death approaching.

I can't know this

I have found lately that, even when I don't feel like driving all the way downtown at 9:30 at night to get my hangout on, just to do it anyway. Turns out, every single time I have, fun times ensue. Even when you park at coffee break and have to walk all the way to Urban Lounge in ballet flats--that make more sense as socks-- when there is wet slushy snow falling all around you. And even when you think the bands you are going to see, will totally suck, you can be super surprised (only one sucked, Anthony called it best: two words, 1.shit 2.sandwich). Plus, seeing people that you haven't seen in ages and having conversations about Doc Emmett Brown from Back to Future ( I love #3 because I love that Doc gets a wife and has two sons, Jules and Vern; it makes my heart smile) and driving around in your own DeLorean and how parts are really expensive so its almost not worth the time; is pretty priceless.

Ummm, yes, I watch this show

Couple of things to address: I wanted to post this photo because both of the men and Nina, look smokin hot! Also I read this and I thought, hey look someone else thinks people should watch this show..... because I know I have tooted my own horn about this show and if that didn't convince you to watch it, maybe this will.

If not, at the end of the day, they are all still very sexy.

Dexter Season 3

Watched the complete 3rd season of Dexter over the weekend. I feel comfortable saying that for me this is the best series on TV. I do, I feel good about saying that. Michael C. Hall plays Dexter so well, it sends shivers down my spine. For me its all in his facial expressions. He has this way of conveying so much, with just raisin an eyebrow. Or my favorite face of all was when he hit Paul over the head with a frying pan in season two (duh... Liz; I am pretty sure Paul is in prison in season two, so season One). It was classic, he knew it was bad, but he felt so good about it. Man, sooo great! 

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It also makes me very interested in reading these books,

(Dexter in the Dark; Darkly Dreaming Dexter)

Twinkle, Twinkle little bat

Are you excited? Are you even planning on seeing Alice in Wonderland, this weekend?

If not, WHAT the HELL?

I need you to think about what you have done

I just read this book for my book club, last month. I have since found myself recommending it to everyone I talk to. It is so funny, I mean laugh out loud High larry ass! I wasn't sure how I was going to feel about it exactly, until I read the back and there was some praise for the book from Ira Glass (who hosts This American Life on NPR on Sundays at six, if you have never listened to this show I highly recommend it.)

That was enough for me. It didn't matter that there was excerpt in Vouge a few months back, telling me to read this book. Or my aunt, whom I trust to have good taste books, recommending it for book club. None of that mattered I kept pushing aside the sound of reason, for my own inner dialogue of  not wanting to go there. I only considered opening it when I saw Ira's stamp of approval. What can I say, I just love him and I love that radio show ( I like to dream that one day I will be on that show). I would probably shave off all my hair Brittany style, if Ira told me to.  In Ira I trust!

iF i cOULD bE aNYTHING; i wOULD bE dISAPPOINTED

As a Utahan, I think I am suppose to love the Osmond's? Like, there should be some sort of Utah Pride, that they are from here? Because they are both a little bit Country and a little bit Rock and Roll? 

Well, I'm not. They could and should take a flying leap off a very short building. <----too soon?

I mean, do we really think Marie passed out on DWTS? Hell no, that was attention getting at its best, what a drama queen, although Marie is smokin hot. Donny on the other hand is straight creepy as hell. His big googly eyes creep me right out. Right out!

And I feel like they need to stop holding on to their 15 minutes. I think they should just fade into obscurity, I at least would really appreciate it. I really would.

Having said this. My heart goes out to Marie and I don't mean to be a total d bag, but I really don't like them. Her shoes in this picture, however, are a totally different thing all together. Love Them!

So long my dough face girl

(I am just sorry none of you can see the amazing pool of drool in this picture)

Lucy and I, have been a bit absent of late, from this here blog. Work lately has just been super busy (I already covered this so...) Anyway I just wanted to drop a quick post and catch you up on what you have missed. 

1. I wonder how I should feel about the fact that there is always a cop at my library? Should I really feel comforted? OR should I start going to a different library? Lastly what are the punk kids doing at that library to warrant a cop there all the time?

2.  When I see young couples from behind I can never tell who is the boy who is the girl? Skinny jeans, is the joke on us?

3. I am paying for my gym membership, I should go, but that sounds as fun as hanging out with Ben Linus. Also, how much longer can my waist band handle pasta every day, my money is on not much longer? 

4. I need to go to the dentist........yup.........still do.

5. Will Lucy ever blog again?

6. Never set up friends on a blind date.

7. How do I feel about Rompers, really? On one hand they tend to be super comfortable. But one the other hand, as an adult, how do I feel about them?

8. If I hold out long enough, will my car vacuum itself?

9. ALKALINE TRIO WAS AMAZING.

10. My gauges are gone, it excites me, now my greasy, crusty ass ears just need to heal. 

11. Even though no one but e seems to be concerned  about the Lost series finale, I am. What if they are all aliens?

12. Why does the left side of my hair curl so well, while the right looks like a pile of steaming crap?

13. Was that really Taylor Lautner ( Jacob Black in the Twilight Movies) in that car today? It (the car) was from California and it looked just like him.

14. First Jazz game thoughts....um......Fun, yup, fun, especially when co workers get drunk and shake their money makers for the jumbotron!