I wanna come back as

I can't help it, I am litteraly almost in tears over it

I think the hardest part of all, is that I could help her. I could dress her everyday and brush her hair and put it in pretty bows and wipe the mascara out from under her eyes. I could be the person no one else in her life will be.

Dead Snow

This was just a delightful little film. Not only was the gore appropriately gory, but it was about kids killing Zombie Nazis, I mean, talk about double the pleasure, double the fun. 

Also this film was good, considering the very real possibility that it could have been really bad. It was a very solid Zombie movie, in that, the writing wasn't cringe worthy, the deaths were good and there wasn't too many times I shouted at the screen "Oh Come, that could never happen!" in fact I only recall that happening once.

As per usual, there is always one person that makes it out of the woods (as it were) and will continue to live their life. However, I offer this assessment of that Horror movie norm. Would you want to continue living after being attacked by Zombie Nazis? After you chainsawed off your own arm, accidentally killed your girlfriend cuz you thought she was a Zombie (cuz she decided to grab your arm, while you were in the middle of hacking Zombies to pieces, seriously, homegirl deserved to die), you watched all your other friends get torn to pieces (literally), I mean how do you be normal after that? What kind of life would that be?

(the girl who lives in  Texas Chainsaw Massacre comes to mind every time)

(there is just no coming back from that)

 And I don't know that I would want to

accuse me all you want of giving up too soon, but I don't know that after a certain point, I would continue to fight for my life. 

So I guess its good that there is also the very refreshing ending of; you thought they made it to safety, but there is a Zombie in their back seat and fade to black..... gives me chills, EVERY TIME!

The 'burbs

Its October and you must know what that means? Its Horror movie time, yay!!!

While The 'burbs isn't so much a horror movie, it still delightfully falls into the Halloween movie watching genre, for sure. 

For the record I love Tom Hanks, especially some amazing THanks circa 1988 and 89, respectively.

This movie is great, because we have all been there. We have all had neighbors that we wished were killing people and burning them in a large furnace in their basements. Because last time I checked, you can't have someone arrested for being white trash, which bums me out big time. However, if you could, my street would be a lot more awesome and a lot less full of white trash people. And when I say white trash, I mean couches on the front lawn, babies in tree swings (that sit dangerously high off the ground, for small humans), missing teeth and the general stench of a life wasted watching WWE, white trash. 

Just when I think I can let it go...

she goes out looking like this
p.s. Brit, I have that sweater in gray and I can't decide how it makes me feel.

Just open this door already

Did the movie "Let the Right One In" need to be remade, hell no!

Was the remake that was just recently released, " Let Me In", worth a watch? Yes!

 The difference's weren't necessary, as the original was well crafted. They were merely the vision of the new Director Matt Reeves. He choose to flesh out some scenes that the original didn't, therefore it was more of re imagining than a shot for shot remake. I appreciated the gore of the new movie. Though I don't know that it added anything more by having it, it was just a personal preference of mine.

The boy Owen, in "Let Me In" seemed weaker and more vulnerable, than Oskar, in "Let the Right One In". Oskar was more of a morbid child (as he was in the book) and every thing that happened to him with the bullying and finding out about Eli being a vampire, was easier for him to accept, than for Owen. 

Owen was more damaged and fearful of his surroundings. Justifiably, as his bullies were much more brutal and violent, than that of Oskar's.  Even Oskar's parents were more present in his life, than Owen's. Who truly had no one, until he found Abby.

All and all, I like them for different things and realizing them as two different versions of the same story, both done well and we are all the better for it.

just because I want to look at something pretty

Dude

He may not be articulate, but he is very sexy and I love him forever and ever amen!

Making a list

I have to laugh sometimes at the News Feed articles that come up,while I am scrolling through my gossip rag, online magazines. Like today, while I was reading about how Emily Deschanel, (sister of one Zooey Deschanel, don't know if you ever heard of her?) got married over the weekend. I happened to spy a news headline that read "Mom robs bank, pickups kids from school". 

My giggle fit was immediate. 

Mostly because all I could think was, what a fabulous multi-tasker this women is. 

And why is she? Because she is a Mom. She could get the house to smell like lemons after she bleaches the twenties. My guess is the pick up, went something like this:  pulling through the drop zone, gently screaming from and open window "Zachary, I can't slow down honey, toss your lunch box and backpack first, we have two more banks to hit up on the way home!"

City of Owls

If there was one thing to be said about 

Legend of the Guardian 

The Owls of Ga Hoole

it's that I spent almost the entire movie squeaking about how cute those damn things were. Especially the little tiny ones that were all eyes and tuffs of feathers.

seriously how cute is this? 

Mostly the movie was forgettable. But the slow motion shots were impressive and its true that no matter what is being said, its soooo cute when owls say it.

also at the beginning, there was a new HP7 trailer its epic awesome!

Happy Birthday

Joan Jett is how old today? 

52

Holy crap, batman.

Let them fall where they may

A few weeks ago, I finally watched my first episode of Jersey Shore. Yes, I do live under a rock. Rest assured it was exactly as I expected; crass, obscene, messy, funny, shameful, lubricated, tan etc. etc. 

These kids know exactly what they are doing and we all know what we are doing by allowing them to do it. Misery loves company. 

That being said, last night I caught a few moments of one Miss Snooki on David Letterman and in spite of myself I found that she was actually rather endearing.

I decided if I could hang out with her, I probably would. I don't know that I would want to hangout with the whole group of them at once, but Snooki....she is pocket sized fun.

Don't put Baby in the corner

I can not let it go, every time I see a picture, I just can't help and think

Jennifer Grey, looks nothing like herself

Also

For your Health!

Dear Clemence Posey

You were possibly the best thing about "In Bruges". Only because as a rule, I don't really like Colin Farrell, although, he was sort of redeeming in that movie, mostly I think, because he played himself. But that isn't why we are here. We are here, because you are absolutely divine. I don't know that you could be any more perfectly french, than if you were specifically crafted to be a perfect french girl. I mean just look at you

The cigarette, the stripped shirt, the way your world is only black and white it is all Donc parfaitement le Francais.

Also, thanks so much for being on Gossip Girl, it warms every cockle of my black heart.

Ra Ra Riot: Kind Day

Two become one

So ...Ashley Tisdale

 (from the High School Musical fame, in case you live under a rock) is now starring in this horribly tragic new CW series called Hellcats (its about Cheerleaders). I accidentally watched this show last week and needless to say, craptastic. Which given her past  resume of work, is not surprising. She is sort of ok, as an actress, she doesn't blow my skirt up by any means, but, she is fine.

The only thing I can't stand about her really, is this face she pulls in all her pictures. It makes my skin craw and I just wanna cut if off of her, you know.

That being said, I was watching this video

and I can't help the nagging feeling that kept creeping into my conscious: 

Zola Jesus (pictured here, for reference, in case you don't watch the video, even though you should) looks like Ashley Tisdale, if Ashley Tisdale was a pasty, stringy haired, badly drawn eyebrow, Gothic chick. Which then got me thinking about the amazing possibility of these two staring in a bad CW series together. In which they would play twin sisters that don't get along, because they hang with such different crowds. Ashley, with the tan Cheerleaders and Zola with the pasty, Goths. Wherein, the season one cliff hanger would be: Will Ashley survive the poison induced coma, Zola put her in, after Zola found out Ashley was sleeping with her boyfriend, Razor (who, coincidentally looks a lot like Trent Reznor). 

I would call it

High School Sucks and then you Die!

Most exciting thing to happen to fall fashion

Netural Milk Hotel; kind of day

Just let it go

How long do you hold onto something? I like to think I can forgive and forget, yet I recently came upon a piece of information about my nemesis from High School and it turns out I have not forgotten or forgiven.

Lets give a brief history. This girl use to be one of my best friends, I was super close with her and her mother (its possible that I loved her Mother, more than her, ever, but that is beside the point). Then for no other reason that the mere fact girls are catty bitches, she decided to spread total lies about me in High School. 

Ok, we managed to move past all of those things, while still in High School, and she even came to my Wedding. 

Yet a few years ago, I saw her at a restaurant and cool guy'd her and proceeded to talk trash about her to the people at my table.

Seriously how old am I? I don't know. 

Then, I just found out (via the ever informative FB, where I am friends with her Mom and not her) that her husband is in a band that is somewhat locally famous albeit totally horrible (rhythms with boil hiss) and I screamed for total joy! And proceeded to reveal in the fact that she is married to a total douchebag and even recounted this exact story to the guys at work, with so much joy and elation in my voice, I was on the verge of crazy.

Apparently I did not forgive or forget or move on from High School and as the words were coming out of my mouth, I couldn't help but feel sorry for myself and feel like I needed a bar of soap, to wash my mouth right out. 

So, I have decided it is time to just let it go and it feels really good.

___ is as __ does

Yes all the plastic surgery has turned Heidi into a barbie doll of her former self. No it wasn't a good idea, but there is nothing she can do at this point except, reduce her implant size, which would require more surgery to rectify, so I say sunk lost. 

Always my thinking when I see famous people and their abs is, just how hungry are they?

Because I know that my abs could look like this too, if I never ate again in my life. However, I really enjoy food, it literally makes me so happy, that I will never, no matter the amount of exercise I endure, have abs this flat. And guess what, I prefer it that way.

When I was younger, I thought for a time about being professionally good looking (aka a model). It was very short lived for a few reasons.  My mother (bless her) sat me down and said "is this really all you want to do with your life, because I can tell you now, you are worth more and deserve more out of life."

But I was young and I thought, what is better than being really good looking?

Well I answered myself, FOOD! is better.

I didn't want to spend the rest of my life starving. So I choose to fight my way to middle of life, just like the rest and although its not as awesome and sometimes it down right stinks. 

AT LEAST I AM  FULL!!

Lord Helmet

This is January Jones on set filming the new X Men movie, however out of context while having a stroll through the meadow with her stunt double, her hat just looks stupid.

Color me confused

Another day, another crappy hair do, seriously Brittany, you could pay someone to follow you around with a hairbrush....and you should

Also, judging by your wardrobe, you might be confused about the fact that you are indeed older than 14. Although I will say how nice it is to see you doing so well. I mean as much as your hair and wardrobe choices just gross me out, I am glad you are no longer crazy. 

Sources say: NO shit

Not that I want to get my dirty fingers in their dirty pies. But seriously does this surprise anyone? I don't know that I hate Kat Von D that much or even Jesse James for that matter, even for the monstrosity of a mistake this might and could be. I mean. I hope Sandra has some loathing for him, but as for me, I just wouldn't date him, because I know (we all know) he is a scumbag. But I don't hate him, that isn't my job. And far be it for me to be surprised that Kat is dating him. She knows what he did, so its just like, what can you tell her that she doesn't already know.

All that aside, if this was a different universe where only good things happen, I think these two would make a lovely couple.

A Mexican or Mexican't

I spend a lot of my time thinking. I do, I am a deep thinker. I think about all sorts of things like:

 should I shave my legs or just wear tights, is my hair redder today, what's for lunch, did I put deodorant on, can one girl own too many dresses, would that color be considered blue or navy or just navy blue, I should consider a spider solitaire contest, text from last night: is so educational, should I ever eat circus peanuts again, should I cut bangs and wear my hair straight, coffee or tea, where would a person find a gold sequined dress with big sequins, how early is too early to start planning a Halloween costume, glasses or contacts, ballet flats or ballet flats, is there a way to go to the gym without having to go to the gym.....

So its really nice when a movie comes along and I don't have to think, I can just enjoy it

MACHETE

I even fell asleep for a part of it and when I woke was still able to figure out what was going on. Now that is what I call pure entertainment.

Wait...who are you?

I have never been able to determine the protocol for running into famous people.  Because I love famous people almost as much as I love cookies, they are just better, on sooo many levels, than regular people. So when you see them, do you scream their name from across a parking lot as they get into an SUV (Sundance and JGL anyone?) or do you act cool and ignore them? Is it ever ok to go up to them and ask for a picture?
I just never know. 

Mind you I don't run into famous people all the time, but I have had my moments.

I recently went on a little trip to L.A. with a friend Amy,  one morning, while walking through Amoeba music (where I was sure there would be hordes of famous faces, I mean right? they just hang out there, right?)

I turned to Amy and said, "I better see at least one famous person while I am in L.A. or else."

I had nothing to back that threat up with, but still the universe knew I meant business. 

Because later that evening while attending a show at the Troubadour....who walks in, right pass me, so close I could have and should have, reached out and pinched him?

Eric Wareheim from Tim & Eric Awesome Show, Great Job!

..pic reference

Dude with glasses is Eric.

Now, I know what you are thinking, he isn't even famous. 

People, I assure you that for me and this guy we were with, he is uber famous, to the point we both giggled like little girls and kept swatting at each other saying "You go talk to him...NO! you go talk to him."

We both decided it was better to play it cool and just keep creepily staring at him from afar.

My next famous sighting was just yesterday, while I was minding my own business in Barnes and Noble at the Gateway. I was pursuing through the magazine section right by the front doors when in walks a very short, long haired hippie looking dude. I was impressed at how quickly my mind registered who it was. It was almost instant recognition that it was indeed, Chris Robinson from Black Crowes and he has in fact had sex with Kate Hudson, yes that is the exact series of thoughts coursing through my head, in that split second of him walking in, me looking up and him removing his sunglasses and 1,2,3....

 Chris Robinson.
As he went by me, he took a double take and even stopped a second at the end of the magazine shelves. I don't think he was checking me out, so much as allowing me to check him out, while also giving me the chance to throw my self at him, if I so desired. Which I would desire, if the following things didn't factor in.

1. He is not very tall at all.
2. I am married
3. As is he and he has a child.
4. Did I mention he wasn't very tall?
5. He slept with Kate Hudson, therefore to sleep with him, would kinda be like sleeping with her and its not that I don't think she is cute, I just wouldn't want to go there. 

Instead I just moved across the store, behind a book shelf and checked him out from there. It was obviously creepy, considering not one, but two, employees came over to ask me if I needed help. I mean, I know they meant finding something, but they might not have been too far off in general.
I would have snapped a picture from my stalker perch, of Chris, except that I had forgotten my phone at home. I am pretty sure that had I had it on me, I would have mustered the courage to go up to him and ask for a picture. Even if its bad famous people protocol.

Is that you Buttercup?

Some people prefer to wear PJ's to the supermarket and some people prefer to wear them on airplanes. Then there are people like Miss Gaga, who prefer to wear studs and Lycra on airplanes.

and truthfully the only thing that distresses me about her decision, is the fact that airplanes are freezing cold. So, I am only nervous that her outfit might just solidify in the coldness and become unable to remove, except by a very large pair of pruning shears.  And while they are pruning her out of her outfit, they might just take her creativity (so she could reconsider sleeping with people, because creativity is taken from solidified garments, not vagina's, sorry for the mix up) and she will no longer be Lady Gaga. Which then leads to her turn as really bad second act on the Disneyland Main stage, directly following Lindsay Loahn's career.

OH, I think you know!

Christina Hendricks, for sure was the best dressed lady at last nights Emmy Awards. If I have said it once, I have said it a million times, Red heads look really good in purple, especially when they have watermelon sized boobs.

Man vs himself

For the most part I love the Travel channel's programming. My only complaint, is the show Man vs Food.

It distresses me that the grand old U.S.A, is so despicable when it comes to portion size. 

Is it not bad enough that these disgusting food mammoths exist, but must we make a show about it? Broadcasting to the entire planet how pig like we are.

And don't get me started on this poor man's bowel movements. I can not for the life of me, get my head around what they must be like. Honestly, it worries me so much, that every time I try to watch this show I myself must poop.Because to me, I don't see him eating a sandwich with french fries. I see diarrhea with a side of anal leakage.

My shoes are lined with my nickels and my tens

Lindsay gets to leave rehab and go home at night, which means all of our drugs...are no longer safe.

and in the vein of Antoine Dodson of the Bed Intruder fame

 we say this to Lindsay

She's climbin in your windows

She's snatchin your crack up

Tryna rape em so you need to 

Hide your drugs

Hide your Booze

Hide your drugs

Hide your Booze

and hide your Sister

cuz she be rapin errbody out here

She don't have to confess

Cuz

She is so dumb, she is really dumb, For Real!

for the sake of stiring shit up

Some people believe that the relationship and subsequent marriage of one Scarlett Johansson and one Ryan Reynolds is a total lie. I for one feel split in two on the subject. I find it really hard to believe that these two beautiful people can be really happy together. I mean... isn't there suppose to be one ugly person in every relationship? And every picture I see of these two, they seem, well apprised of the fact that they are both really good looking and therefore have nothing to talk about. Only do they have something to talk about when they are both standing in front of a mirror and throwing compliments at each other.

"Your eyebrows are so well sculpted"

" NO! your eyebrows are so well sculpted"

"Shut up, your abs are to die for"

"NO! your abs are to die for"

"Shut up and lets have really attractive sex"

"NO! you are really attractive sex"

Then again ....I think its just what we need to believe to help us sleep at night.

Taking all the fun outta the job

There is something to be said about the mysteries of life. The not knowing 100 percent about how things are going to turn out. It is sort of like a continual Christmas morning and those of us who choose to let life wash over us in a wave of beautiful uncertainty, are better for it. I am not talking about turning out, as in the afterlife part, because there are actually a whole lot of theories on that. I am simply talking about how your life, the one you are living, will unfold around you. Who will come into your life, at what time etc. etc. and I find comfort in the unplanned and the thrill of it all.

But what if there was a way, what if you could know 100 percent, no question. 

Would you want that opportunity?

 this movie Timer, totally dives into that possibility. Its smart and funny and really well cast!
Not only that, but I am a total sucker for movies where the wardrobe people are on point and they put the main character in perfectly fitting (not just in actual size but fitting for the character) clothing. I often spend most the time in movies, silently chastising the wardrobe department for choosing such non nonsensical outfits. I am trying to think of an example, nothing is really coming to the forefront of my mind, but lets just say overall, the wardrobe in most movies, is extremely disappointing, as a rule. 

This movie was simply and exception to that rule. They chose a style for her, that worked well and I really appreciated it.  I wish I could find better pictures to illustrate my point and because I can not, you will just have to trust me.  Also, I was totally  loving the main boy, not just because he was on Gossip Girl last season
and or in Stick It! or that his hair is dark and sort of curly and who am I kidding, those are the exact reasons I was loving him...I am shallow, what can I say. Stick a toe in and my depth is exhausted.

If you get a chance in your life to watch this movie, I suggest you do! Not only for the great wardrobe or the pretty boy, but because it was a good movie.

You are so welcome

So I don't know that everyone out there wanted at one point to be Jenny Lewis.

 but I did really, really bad back in 2003.

I have this really obsessive personality and when I get into something, I get into it all the way. Almost to the point of creepy, I guess. But, my want to be her was more just wearing really interesting (or disgusting, depending on who you asked) vintage outfits and listening to Rilo Kiley until my ears were bleeding. I luckily stopped short of tracking her down,cutting her hair off and making a vest out of it.

Now I have discovered that while I am personally nowhere near as adorable or talented as her, I am alright and being Liz, will do just fine.

That and I don't know how impressed I have been lately with the music she is making. 

(Until August 31st you can listen to the entire Jenny and Johnny "I'm Having Fun Now" album)

Does, not loving her music, have anything to do with the fact that I am mildly jealous of Johnathan Rice and his relationship with her? ummm......maybe.

In Pale Force

Conan O'Brien and Jack White Team Up for New Spoken Word 7" Single

This excites me greatly because I just love me some Conan...how do you feel about it?

Monster

She went from Cyndi Lou Who, to a social climbing fashion designer 

to this:

and she is only....17 

really though, what else does she have to look forward to?

Nothing matters but the stache

Happy Freaking Tuesday!!

The Swell Season covers Neutral Milk Hotel

This is one of my favorite Neutral Milk Hotel songs, sung by the Swell Season, Yay!! this just turned my day around fo sho!! if you feel like seeing other amazing covers (ie Fruit Bats doing Hall and Oats, please bless) at A.V. Undercover, then click here, and I highly, highly recommend you do!

Like a Virgin

So everyone loves Madonna, she is fantastic and iconic and blah, blah, blah. I mean I love her music and I don't ever hate it, but rest assured I hate Madonna as a person. Which is crazy, because I will defend Elton John, to the death and I am pretty sure he is an even bigger diva, than Madonna, by leaps and bounds. But that is my right. I don't care that everyone thinks he is crappy person, but I totally care that I think Madonna is one.

That being said, I am so glad Guy Ritchie is no longer Mr. Madonna. I am happy to have him back making great movies (ie Sherlock Holmes) and not shit ones (ie Swept Away), and I am glad that his current lady friend is hot, like Madonna use to be, before she turned into a toned and taunt crypt keeper. I mean we all age, but girlfriend has never done it worse...

I am just saying.....

I am just going to reach my hand in there and pull it out

Apologies to anyone who might find this post as way too much information, to know about Liz, ever. 

Before my vacation to California two weeks ago (what? you didn't know that I went to California? well, now you do) I decided that for my beach time, I was going to get a Brazilian wax. For those who don't know what a Brazilian wax is...it is when you remove all of your pubic hair. Unlike a bikini wax, where in, you only remove the hair you would see wearing bikini bottoms. Justifiably, you might ask yourself, why? Why Brazilian? Well....I counter... why not? My thinking was, why not go for broke, if I am going to have someone down there, can't we just clean up shop and call it a day?

Back when I was in hair school, I took a Aesthetics course. And during this course I had everything waxed that has ever been waxed before: eyebrows, mustache, legs, armpits, bikini, etc. etc. We also watched a very graphic and very educational video on the Brazilian wax, but never did we actually do a Brazilian. I remembered, as I was thinking about getting a Brazilian, that my bikini wax, all those years ago, didn't hurt. So I was fully confident that a Brazilian wouldn't be all that different. Oh Boy! was I ever wrong.

It was the day before I left for California. I had put off getting the waxing done until the very last minute. Not on purpose but simply out of necessity to everything else I was trying to get done before I left. I was super busy at work and knew I wouldn't be able to leave early, so I had to schedule the appointment for my lunch hour. I wasn't sure, but had to believe that something like that should only last an hour. I mean do you really want someone ripping your hairs, out of anywhere, let alone your privates, for more than an hour? 

I was late getting there and flustered about it. Then they had me wait and wait and wait. I waited in that stupid room for almost thirty minutes. Generally, I am very patient, but I was on a time crunch and I admittedly shot them a few, are you serious, with this waiting, looks. Finally the girl came to get me and I inwardly sighed that she looked clean and normal.  If I am going to have anyone spend anytime with that part of my body, they better, for sure, look clean, I mean right. 

Because of the time situation, I didn't think about how uncomfortable it was to disrobe and lay on a table, completely naked from the waist down, except a small white wash cloth. My waxer knocked on the door gingerly and for the life me I can't remember her name. Rest assured it was completely forgettable, which is a pity, because she was awfully sweet.

She came in and asked "So, is this your first Brazilian?" 

"Yes..but I have had a bikini wax before." I gulped and hesitated before asking my question, because I feared the answer. "Is this your first Brazilian?" I asked as conversationally as I could manage.

"No, I average at least one a day." 

And I audibly sighed in relief. 

"Ok, are you ready she asks?" as she rubs the strip she has placed on my bikini line area. I nod and feel absolutely confident in my readiness.

She pulls the flesh taunt and rips.

"Sweet, Fancy...*(&*&!, *&*%^%!!!" 

"Just a little sting." she says with a smile that I want to knock off her face. Just a little sting, is an understatement. Each time she pulls the skin and says something reassuring and I brace myself for the coming pain, I can't help thinking...why? why? Some strips are more painful than others and I have constant plea of stop, for the love of...STOP!. Yet in the back of my mind I tell myself, no one has died from getting a Brazilian, you can do this. Though, that toughness does me no good as the next teeth chattering strip is ripped from my tender flesh and I let out a loud curse.

I try to make small talk to distract myself from crying or peeing, because for some reason, those two sensations come to forefront. But eventually I just lie there and soak up the overwhelming pain in all of its glory. Because I have no one to blame but myself and Tyra Banks.

"Do you bruise easily?" My waxer asks while applying the soothing after lotion, that also helps remove residual wax.

"Yeah" I say looking down at my legs that are speckled with random bruises from running into stationary things, "I bruise easily."

"Hmmm..yeah, it looks like you do."

And I manage a peek and see a nice purple bruise forming right on my bikini line. Great! not only does it feel like I was punched in the crotch, now it literally looks like I have been. 

"Ok, I will step out while you get dressed and then I will take you to pay."

She leaves and I gingerly reapply my clothes, making sure not to disrupt the tenderness. I also can't help wondering why anyone would want to pay for this. I feel like society should have a running tab, for all Brazilian wax jobs for me an the entire female population, for here until the world cease's. I mean it is the least they could do for us.

As I get in my car and realize that it hurts a bit to sit down, I can't help but think.....all in all, I would give it another go. And that people is the most painful part of it all.

on the way back home

Nothing can be done about the absolutely crippling fear that grips me every year when the Back to School commercials start in. Each time I see one, my palms begin to sweat and my heart skips to a triple beat and I am frozen to my chair with wide eyes. Pure fright and Panic.

It also starts a steady string of dreams in which I am not graduating high school, because I failing gym. I think in reality this is my subconscious telling me to go back to school, that I have some unfinished business, school and I. But I really wish my inner crazy, communicated this to me in a less: crying and shaking in the corner, over backpacks: sort of way.